Lessons from a Viral #MeToo Tweet

[jimhines]

I posted the following on Twitter yesterday, and it kind of exploded on me.

Or maybe it’s a way to unite decent men and women against sexual predators and harassment. https://t.co/lcrYb6jKlB

— Jim C. Hines (@jimchines) September 17, 2018

Now that the responses are beginning to die down, here are nine Very Important Lessons I learned from Very Helpful Men.

1. “Harassment” is just too vague, and men will end up shunning women altogether to protect themselves!

This is an actual thing Tweeted by, I assume, an actual man. I think he meant this to be a negative outcome of the #MeToo movement. But pretty much all the women I’ve spoken with and listened to would love it if guys who can’t distinguish flirting or friendly interaction from harassment would just leave them the hell alone. So, win-win?

2. Apparently, I’m bald.

A number of people made a point of mentioning this. As you can imagine, I was quite shocked. Bald? Me? When did this happen? Why didn’t anyone tell me sooner? (Many of these same men wanted me to know I’m unattractive as well. Which is a shame, given all the work I’ve done to appeal to the toxic male troll demographic.)

3. Women who don’t want to be harassed should stop dressing up and putting on makeup, since this is something women do only to get men’s attention. (Which is why men never wear makeup!)

This came as shocking news to the many women who wear makeup because, you know, they like the way it makes them look. And to women who dress up because it’s required for their job. And to men who wear makeup. And to the countless women who were harassed and assaulted no matter what they were or weren’t wearing.

Multiple guys jumped in with this victim-blaming bullshit. I’m happy to say they were thoroughly mocked and blocked.

4. A single accusation from the #MeToo witch-hunters is enough to destroy a man’s life and career.

I know, right? I mean, look what happened to this poor man who was accused of harassment by well over a dozen women. The only job he could find after that was President of the United States.

5. But men can be victims too, and women can be perpetrators!

I’m not sure what about my tweet made people think they needed to make this point, but yes. Absolutely. Men can and are often victims of sexual harassment and assault, and while the majority of perpetrators are men, there’s no gender restriction here.

Shoutout to Terry Crews in particular, who has done heroic work speaking out as a survivor of sexual assault, and helping to raise awareness for male victims.

6. I guess I pee sitting down?

Of all the trolling Tweets telling me I wasn’t a “real man,” this was my favorite. I mean, this guy has such a toxic, rigid, fragile sense of masculinity that his go-to insult was, “Oh yeah? Well, you pee sitting down!” Makes me wonder if this is one of those guys who’s so insecure he won’t even use the toilet seat to poop.

And the underlying assertion that supporting #MeToo and being against sexual harassment makes you less of a man? Just…wow.

7. This Tweet will not get me laid.

I’m so glad to hear this. I mean, that Tweet has had almost 700,000 impressions so far. If I had to have sex with even a fraction of those people… Look, I’m 44 years old, all right? I’m in pretty good shape, but that’s just ridiculous.

Also, does anyone else find it pitiful that, for some guys, the only reason they can conceive of for speaking out against sexual harassment is to try to get laid?

8. The #MeToo movement didn’t care about Bill Clinton’s sexual predation!

That’s right, this movement that didn’t exist during Clinton’s time as president had no impact on his sexual behavior. Alas, if only someone would invent a time-traveling hashtag.

9. Catcalls and sexual harassment are compliments!

Cool, cool. Please take this steel-toed boot to your nethers as a compliment as well.

Mirrored from Jim C. Hines.

Comments

[phantom_wolfboy]

Wait -- you're bald? You? Bald?!

They seriously thought that would insult you?

[martianmooncrab]

I would have been wondering how so many could actually know how to tweet...

[tielan]

Please take this steel-toed boot to your nethers as a compliment as well.

Can I use this as a legal defence perchance?

"I was complimenting him by kicking him in the balls!"

[ckd]

The response I'm often tempted to make to the Wild Whatabouts who appear and bring up Bill Clinton: "Bill Clinton is not the President, nor is he up for a Supreme Court seat. I'll make you a deal; if we pass a law saying that Bill Clinton can never run for President again, would you stop bringing him up?" (Because the odds that they don't know about, or at least don't remember, the existence of the 22nd Amendment are significantly higher than zero.)

[jreynoldsward]

Yeah, well, I got to deal with a hypocrite who believes Kavanaugh but bemoans what he perceives as the EEEEEVol exploitation by Hollywood of wimmens. When challenged, his retort was that I needed to be laid and hadn't been laid for thirty-some years (news to my husband, I'm sure).

Welp, I finally shut him up by suggesting that perhaps he belonged in the incel camp and his primary exposure to female genitalia was airbrushed Playboy product. No comeback to that one. But ARRRGH. Really?

[conuly]

You gotta wonder at the mindset of people who think that their asinine rebuttals are worth sharing with the world. I mean... what is going on with them even!?

[jkusters]

Many of these sound like open invitations for them to be oggled, harassed, and objectified by gay men. I can't fathom how many of them would respond if catcalled by butch biker dudes...

[conuly]

I don't want to subject anybody to their probable response, though.